Monday, August 3, 2015

Ken Paxton could lose his job as a state official and have to stop lawyering for the rest of his life.

Holy crap. I can’t believe I forgot to show you my latest shopping conquest! They’re small glass bathroom canisters by InterDesign that measure about 3½" wide by 5" tall, maybe the same size as a can of soda except for the short one, which isn’t. I ordered FIVE of these cute little hoo-hahs from Amazon ... two with bronze lids (see below) for the family room and for my nightstand in the master bedroom, and three with chrome lids for the bathrooms. Aside from being relatively cheap they’re also exquisitely useful. I’ll fill three with emergency glucose tablets because I’m diabetic, one with Q-Tips, and I’ll use the short one as a classy denture cup. I’M SO EXCITED I CAN HARDLY STAND IT. (Stop laughing immediately.)


I’ve got some hot news from the Lone Star State, people! Our gay-hating, right-wing Attorney General Ken Paxton surrendered at the Collin County Jail this morning on THREE FELONY INDICTMENTS for securities fraud. 
First-degree securities fraud indictments carry a potential penalty of up 99 years in prison and a third-degree charge carries a maximum sentence of 10 years in prison. If convicted, Paxton would lose his job as a state official and have to stop lawyering for the rest of his life. Holy shit, THIS WOULD BE WONDERFUL. Paxton’s fraud-faced smirking smugshot appears above.




Thank you for reading this. I think I’ll eat pretzels now and watch a movie.

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